Guest: Melek Şen
Title of The Work: Post: Recipient Empty (3rd Letter)
Original Title: Posta: Alıcı Boş (3’üncü Mektup)
Genre: Letter Novel
The clock on the wall reads 05:45. An incessant siren sounds from outside. I stagger out of bed and look out of the window. The ambulance doors are wide open and a young girl is being taken on a stretcher. It is immediately obvious from the faces of the few people with her that they are grieving, thoughtful and sad.
Human memory seems to be trapped in unhappiness. When I observe myself and those around me, I see that the most clearly remembered memories contain emotions such as ‘fear, pain…’.
Of course, there are also happy memories, but it is very difficult to relive that feeling. I think we seem to be holding on to the pain, just like the siren sound that took me back to the days when I was writhing with unhappiness.
It was a siren that took my grandmother away from me.
It was the sound of a siren, tearing me away from my home and finding myself in an unfamiliar place.
It was a siren sound that burdened my conscience.
I am so sure that these three things created the me I am now. Ask yourself, ‘the current you is a summary of what you have been through…’
Of course, there is no rule that something profound will happen.
Doesn’t a certain group of people live a flat, monotonous, robotic life?
I just wonder: What brings us to this state? Simply put, aren’t we shaped by the clothes you want to wear, the school you want to go to, the guidance or pressure of your family? Or the jobs we work out of necessity, the system, doesn’t the system force you to work 6 days a week just for a few pennies and live in an environment you don’t like and don’t belong to? Or aren’t there those who are recognised as individuals from childhood and supported to build their own lives according to their talents and interests?
These are blended with the emotions in our inner world and reflected on our body. Are these not the reasons for the lines on our face, the meaning in our gaze, the tears in our eyes, the smile on our lips?
I am in such non-stop thoughts. If I silence one of them, other questions arise, I look for answers to them. I tell myself so many times, “What the hell is wrong with me?” But I can’t. I can’t silence the voices in my mind, I can’t close the aching places in my heart. While I walk on the line in front of me, I continue to swing left and right. Those who live by saying “What the hell is wrong with me?”… Is that so? Between you and me, I liken these people to fish. They forget what they see and hear and live in an aquarium. People who are satisfied with what they have, who don’t think of anything better, who don’t want to venture into deep waters. Some of them risk drowning in those deep waters.
Actually, I was going to tell you other things. However, the siren sound in the morning affected me greatly. While our body is stuck in the existing time period, our soul is travelling from the past to the present…
See you soon.
