Guest: Mustafa Memiş
Title of The Work: Questions for Myself: Part 1
Original Title: Kendime Sorular: Bölüm 1
Genre: Prose Writing
If I had one day to live and only one choice…
Who would I want to spend that day with?
Why don’t I go to her right now and hug her?
My pride, my personality, my rights, my wrongs, the opinions of those around me, my own ideas, what life has taught me so far or what I have not learnt so far prevent me from doing this…
Have I ever thought about whether all this really matters
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If I knew that every day I make constant choices between life and death…
Would I stubbornly choose to die?
I’m living a life I’m not happy with and I realise it’s killing me slowly, torturously…
So why do I choose to die every moment and not try to change it?
I don’t have the power to change my own life, I’m tired, lonely and I’ve lost my meaning…
Have I never been on the winning side in a battle before? Am I going to sit in my corner like a spoilt child to avoid repeating this
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If I realised I’d wasted my life chasing wealth for fear of poverty…
Isn’t my loneliness the real poverty?
I have broken, I have spilled, I have not pitied, I have despised, I have belittled, I have not believed, I have not understood, I have not shared, I have climbed the stairs one by one, but I have not looked back, I have trampled…
Will I continue like this even though I realise that the reason for my loneliness is my actions?
Will I choose to be alone, knowing that the most beautiful moments I have experienced are actually the ones I share
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If I thought there was no reason for my existence…
How can I keep breathing?
All my life I’ve drifted whichever way the wind blew, never thinking about why I lived. Cold winds from barren mountains or storms on the seas blew me to the ground…
Why don’t I find a reason for my existence and drive my motorbike into the endless blues with the wind I blow?
Will the calm power of the seas, their devoted souls and lives unafraid of death never be my inspiration
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Pick the buds while there’s still time. Time is still flying, and the flower that smiles today may be dying tomorrow.
